a letter to white Christians

Dear white Christians, 
I'm confused. 
I'm confused because I grew up alongside you reading the same Gospel as you and yet our lives don't look the same. 
I'm confused because we serve the same God and yet I do not reap the same benefits as you. 
I'm confused because we find joy in the same promises and yet I am struck with the pain of injustice every day. 
Dear white Christians, 
I'm lost. 
I'm lost among the lists of names I continue to mourn over every week. 
I'm lost watching people use the scripture I use to comfort myself to justify ignorance. 
I'm lost trying to exist in a world that doesn't completely agree over my worth of existence. 
Dear white Christians,
I'm hurt. 
I'm hurt by the comments I've heard not only by  strangers by but my own brothers and sisters in Christ about people that look like me. 
I'm hurt by the lack of love and comfort in our current church. 
I'm hurt by those I call friend.
Dear white Christians, 
I'm scared. 
I'm scared to one day raise children in a world that doesn't accept them. 
I'm scared to park my car at the grocery store, to go anywhere after 8pm without a friend, to just be.
I'm scared to lose my life because of a 'misunderstanding'.
I'm scared to become a hashtag. 
Dear white Christians, 
"Defend the weak and the fatherless; uphold the cause of the poor and the oppressed" - Psalm 82:3
"Speak up for those who cannot speak for themselves, for the rights of all who are destitute. Speak up and judge fairly; defend the rights of the poor and needy." - Proverbs 31:8-9
"Learn to do right; seek justice. Defend the oppressed. Take up the cause of the fatherless; plead the case of the widow"- Isaiah 1:17
Time and time again, our mission in Christ is made clear.  
Our mission sometimes makes us complicit in our sins. 
Our mission reveals our faults. 
Do not let that stop you from seeking out justice. 
Dear white Christians, 
I love you. 
You are my brother/sister in Christ for eternity. 
We serve the same God. 
We are redeemed by the same blood. 
I hold no anger towards you. 
Dear white Christians, 
"Dear friends, since God so loved us, we also ought to love one another. No one has ever seen God; but if we love one another, God lives in us and his love is made complete in us." - 1 John 4:11-12
As our God comforts us, I am asking for you to comfort me. 
As our God mourns with us, I am asking for you to mourn with me. 
As our God defends us, I am asking for you to defend me. 


Dear Lord, 
"Guard my life and rescue me; do not let me be put to shame, for I take refuge in you. 
May integrity and uprightness protect me, because my hope, Lord, is in you." - Psalm 25:21